Woman's boyfriend tells her that he would break up with her if she performed CPR on someone else: 'Who breaks up with their "soulmate" over saving someone's life?'

Author image for Baiz Hoen
Baiz Hoen
Mar 9, 2025 10:00 AM EDT

One of the biggest things to learn in order to be a good partner is how to maintain your jealousy. Because, let's be real, we'd all be lying to ourselves and others if we said we weren't jealous. Jealousy is a natural and human emotion to feel. When it feels like someone else might be encroaching on someone that we've made a pact with, it hurts! And feels scary! So it's absolutely okay to be jealous. It's just up to us to learn how to recognize it, examine the situation, and understand if it's a valid concern. 

The reason why jealousy gets a bad rap is because so often people let it go unchecked. We've all heard horror stories from friends or family about a partner's jealous outbursts. When someone's jealousy gets the best of them, when it blinds their good judgment, it's embarrassing to watch. One girl came to Reddit to tell about her boyfriend's jealous outburst, where he told her he wouldn't let her perform CPR on another person. Restricting anyone's behavior is a red flag, but preventing them from saving a life just to save your ego? Well, why don't you scroll through to see what you think of the situation.


 

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    "AITA for thinking it's crazy for my boyfriend to say that he would break up with me if I gave another person CPR?"

    My boyfriend and I have been together for almost two years, we live together, and we've always said that we plan to marry each other-- he constantly tells me that we're soulmates. Two weeks
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    that we're soulmates. Two weeks ago, he really messed up and we ended up breaking up-- but after, he begged me crying, telling me I'm his soulmate and he'd rather di than be with someone else, etc. etc., so I agreed to think about things and he was kind of on a "relationship probation. period" of some kind, but then a couple days later he says this.
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    By 'this' I mean: he said he would break up with me if i gave someone CPR (specifically mouth to mouth), even if i saved their life and no one else was around to help them (even his dad [he said i would never be in this situation], an old woman, whatever). He said this was just
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    whatever). He said this was just one of his "boundaries" and that he could do it because he plans to be a doctor one day but i couldn't as my profession doesn't ask for that (this feels like a crazy double standard to me).
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    That sort of goes against the hippocratic oath if you ask me...

    He said that if i wanted to be with him, i can't give anyone CPR― | should let them di (call and wait for an ambulance). He kept on saying like "oh, so what, is this a dealbreaker for you then?".
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    I think it's absurd because it's one thing being uncomfortable, it's another thing to break up with me and lose me over saving someone elses' life?? Especially we weren't even fully together yet either-- he was supposed to be like convincing me that he became a better partner or whatever.
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    This is like a drop in the ocean of what he does too; during this period too, on Valentine's Day, he didn't do anything to acknowledge me or show appreciation for me (mind you, guys on the street that were strangers even wished me a happy Valentine's Day), and
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    happy Valentine's Day), and instead, he had the audacity to ask us to be intimate "one last time" because he missed me and "loves me so much". No card, no flowers (he knows I adore flowers and am so appreciative of them), no gifts, no recognition, nothing after almost two years, especially after this rough patch (you would think he'd go the extra mile to win me over). Am I going crazy??
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    Like he'll be a crappy 'boyfriend' but then be like "you're mine and can't give CPR to anyone". Who breaks up with their "soulmate" over saving someone's life??? | feel like I'm going insane because I lowkey feel gaslighted like he's trying to make me feel like all of this is normal (this is the tip of the iceberg lol).
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    Also, I swear to God, on my mom's life that I'm telling the whole truth in this story lol (some people don't believe me haha). Also, the worst part about this is that we signed a lease on our apartment for two years (we have a year and a half left)-- if y'all have any advice on what to do, I'd rly appreciate it. Thank u :) <3
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    Everyone agreed in the comments: it's time to break! that! lease!

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    Boy, bye.

    Imagine being so insecure you want your SO to commit murder by inaction. NTA
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    'plans to be a doctor'-is he in medical school? On track to graduate with a BS that will get him into medical school? In a residency program? Frankly, this guy sounds. crazy, unstable, and delusional. Run. Talk to your land lord and see if there is any way out of the lease.
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    You said "like he'll be a crappy boyfriend then be like you're mine and can't do CPR on anyone". I'm pretty sure that sentence says it all. He is a crappy boyfriend and he's so insecure that he wouldn't even "allow" you to save someone's life? The bombastic side eye I am giving you both right now for entirely different reasons.
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    Gurl talk to your landlord and see if you can either get out of your lease or substitute another person. Someone get out of there and get a roommate. This man is showing you who he is and it's an insecure, controlling dud.
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    Girl, you had the right idea when you broke it off the first time. He sounds like a crummy boyfriend and that's without the details of what he did that nearly ended the relationship a few weeks ago! Time to stick a fork in this relationship and call it done.
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    The lease is going to be an annoying complication, not gonna lie. First read the lease and see what happens if you break it. Maybe you pay a fine and it's done? If you're stuck with it, ideally one of you moves out and the other either takes over the lease or brings on a new roommate. If you go that
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    roommate. If you go that route, make sure to re-do the lease paperwork with the landlord so you've got the right folks on the lease - the last thing you need is this guy skipping out on rent up your credit. and
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    Also real talk: the sobbing and especially the "I'll di without you" stuff is concerning. Your first priority is your personal safety. Even if it feels like overkill, please call a local domestic violence hotline and get some advice on how to handle the breakup and move! It's honestly probably fine but...better safe than sorry.
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    info: How did the topic of CPR come up?? Did you mention wanting to learn first aid or something?? It is a very specific topic.
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    He is not going to be a good doctor if this is his way of thinking. His ethics and morals are not at par with someone who genuinely wants to help people
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    Better see a doctor, but not this girl's boyfriend!

    NTA. This gave me a headache.
    via MasterpieceBorn1946

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Dating-Relationships boyfriend aita cpr ex boyfriend reddit story relationships reddit thread Reddit toxic relationship relationship drama
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